Ceremony 24

November 2, 2009

Working where you cannot see.



It is said that the first day of a five ceremony session phase is often ‘light’… (7 day total: Two ceremonies, one day off, two more, another day break and ending with the fifth ceremony on a Sunday evening). Last night qualified as the second lightest night, although curiously enough, it is the first ceremony where I experienced the outcome of the medicine at the latest point in ceremony (nearly 1.5 hours into the evening). The Sanango was the most powerful aspect of the door opening… This was the first of five ceremonies that I’ll have with a group of deaf people (Twelve are deaf/partially deaf, while there are three hearing-translators and one regular visitor). An incredible group!

Starting with a healthy quarter cup, soon I felt that this may be another second-dose evening; though something told me to wait… Also Luco hadn’t asked me if I wished more and I took this as his possible intuition into my evening… When the Yage-door did eventually open, this lasted for nearly an hour…

Note: Nearly everyone on the group took second doses…

Very few Shipibo-design overlays; those I did experience were as vast and all encompassing as usual, yet the images themselves were very compact…

While I was wondering about the effectiveness of this ceremony, a voice came to me and said that these five ceremonies would be different than the others, that they’d be preparatory and that, “I (Yage) will be doing work you cannot see.”

At one place towards the end of the ceremony I was curious about our scheduled journey into Space that Ayahuasca had spoken about in C.23: Suddenly a very deep/trance-like state came over me and while in this half here/half some-place else (I could not discern), a voice said, “You are already Space.” Vaguely I recall some fragment of another dimension’s landscape (airspace). I was told that my sex was my sun, to keep this ‘part’ of me, above all else,
safe and holy/sacred.

During this time I could feel Sanango deepening; I experienced my feet feeling very heavy and my entire body seemingly breathed in and out via a different route than that of the lungs… For the first time Sanango entered my heart, (I had to lay down for awhile)… It worked there for about 20-30 minutes; today at breakfast I felt the medicine still working… Also last night there was activity in my third eye area. No specific visions excepting the sensation of a long, rectangular container associated with a brief/spontaneous healing I did for my friend in CA. Eventually I pushed through this ‘box’, though did not find out what was inside… At first it ‘felt’ like it could be a coffin, though this did not develop into a conviction, nor did it ‘speak’ or ‘show’ either way (?)

Yage told me tonight that the vehicle for my child would come to me through the medicine, also that my child would be “a prince” or “prince in the medicine”, to be ready and to take great care…

Another message was that when I drink ‘her’ she drinks me; there was a small hint that when I purge, she (Yage) purges as well, though this later ‘sense’ I felt may have been associative/symbolic link-thinking on my part…

Note: My sending of heart-love to my Mother and Father, Laura and her son, Anne, Anna, etc. I wore an amethyst and sodalite necklace (a gift from my friend in CA) for the first time tonight… Giving Jeff the rose quartz crystal to borrow during ceremony.

The medicine was definitely ‘working’ in my large and small intestines and saturating throughout, simply, very little ‘electricity’ making it to my eyes, i.e., much more earthy, semi-hidden, etc. (Experiencing big sighs at the heights of Sanango.)

Mid-ceremony; I felt that there was a sort of tension in the air (for me), i.e., my mind connecting with the abundant amount of ‘housekeeping’ going on (people lighting lighters,
exchanging things, speaking to one another, moving around, asking questions, (15+ people being helped by the assistants, etc.) There were allot of different scenarios with so many people that my heart and mind latched onto this in a sort of motherly way; also that the simultaneous icaros being sung by two people felt at odds within me, as if they were competing for space.

Soon this perception would transform into a beautiful revelation that I had never experienced a woman (Meghan) in her own element supporting a man (Luco) in his, both working together naturally, without thought, through a ‘vehicle’ of some kind in a royal symbolic relationship…

Now that I write this, I sense that this ‘relation’ is only ‘a way’, a kind of momentary expression of ‘flower’, though not flower, both found and profound, ephemeral and transcendent!

Note: I received a lesson in ‘Family-patience’ during this busy-stage of people’s preparations for ceremony and attempts to settle into their ‘right’ amount of medicine.

Paul and I went to the river at 1AM; again, I went solo later in the morning for the final cleanse… Paul’s drinking of a second dose and throwing it out immediately (My first-witnessing of such a phenomenon in ceremony).

It was certainly a different sort of ceremony where the medicine was orchestrating doses in a finite way, although they were not necessarily as comparable in effect to other ceremony-night’s wide variety of visions, journeys and general dialog within the electronic realms…

Note: A beautiful icaros by Meghan! Her healing ventiatas for one of the deaf-people…

The psychically-tactile quietness of the zone settled upon us very late into the evening, mainly due to the second dose needs of the group mid-way through the ceremony, which rolled it back to our having two ceremony beginnings in one night (another first), beautiful!

Notes: Grasping the new necklace and sending out gratefulness and thanks to my friend…

Feeling that I had a full-moon headache, and that the medicine was working under a sort of sheath via this energy.

The working with the mica-sediment stone during ceremony via my lower body areas; Aya telling me to keep it tucked in my sweat pant-elastic band; I also placed it on my small intestines. I experienced the stone briefly speaking to me, concerning keeping it near, etc.

Yage telling me to, “Be careful at the river.” [Eventually finding that the river was very low and its wading-edge/shore-stone drop off was unusually close to my entry point.]

The meeting with a toad on the path while going back to the Main House from the river and something flying over Paul and I. Feeling ‘clean’, reconciled, holy, quiet, new… Original ‘I’ with no reminder-memory from Mind.